Posted by Paul Daniels, Partner
‘Matchday Report MONSOON 17 ROYDS LLP 16’ by Gareth Williams
There were a number of footballing upsets last night including defeats for Chelsea, Liverpool and Manchester City, but none can be more surprising than the defeat suffered by our gallant five-a-side team in deepest darkest Shepherds Bush.
The result did not make the morning papers due to the fact that the Match of the Day reporter is still trying to find his way back from the Sports Centre to White City Underground Station.
Under the inspired leadership of Bharat Nahar with his Churchillian team talk at the start of the match (which unfortunately was missed by many of the team who were still trying to find the location), how could we lose.
After sustained pressure led to early strikes for Monsoon, team Royds began to get into its stride and with deadly strikes which trickled over the line, our superiority was beginning to tell.
The turning point appeared to come when Patrick Hart came on as a substitute for the opposition.
Appropriate representations may be made to the FA bearing in mind the fact that the transfer window ended some weeks ago since the rejuvenated Monsoon side began to pressurise our goal resulting in their dominance for much of the remainder of the game.
All this despite crunching tackles on the female members of the opposition by our omnipresent Captain and some deft footwork from other members of the team.
Tensions were getting high towards the end, but were appropriately dealt with by Frank Davey from our Morden Office who refereed the game superbly, so much so that when everybody was completely shattered after the sixty minutes, Frank refused to blow the whistle and insisted that a further twelve minutes should be added on.
Rumours that we threw the game are being investigated by the SRA for match fixing allegations are simply not true, honest!