October 15, 2021

Baby loss awareness week 2021 – one mother’s story of the loss of her newborn baby

Candle light

The pain of the loss of a child was the driving force behind the charity Group B Strep Support when tragically Jane and Robert Plumb lost their newborn baby Theo due to GBS infection. They broke the silence on the dangers of this infection and the at times insurmountable grief suffered by parents and family on the death of a baby.

The theme of this year’s baby loss awareness week is “Wellbeing” and what such a loss means to people from all walks of life affected by pregnancy and baby loss. The pain, grief and suffering of our clients who have lost a baby is felt deeply by those of us at Royds Withy King who seek to find answers for them.

One of our client’s, Lucy (name changed to protect her privacy), has also been brave enough to break the silence of the impact of baby loss and tells her story on the lasting impact of her loss here:

After the birth of my twins I was not able to hold my babies and they were taken away quickly for support in NICU. Shortly after the birth my baby boy was then transferred to NICU in another hospital and I was on my own; one of the nurses came to speak to me that night and told me that my little boy had died. I was desperately upset. I just cried and cried and cried. I was desperate to get to him and I tried to call a taxi but the nurses said that I would need an ambulance. The ambulance seemed to take forever. I wish they had called me earlier so that I could have cuddled James before he died, I felt so angry and upset that he died without me holding him and giving him comfort. I had been so worried that he was in pain before he died.

Following James’ death, I was extremely distressed and became very emotionally detached in general, but I had to keep going for his twin sister. I am a Christian but was unable to go back to Church for about 6 months. I had recurrent thoughts about James for about 2 years after his death. Two years after he died, I had a dream about James and he was talking to me in my dream and saying he would come back.

I have been incredibly down since James died but since January of this year, I have begun to feel a little brighter as my daughter is growing up and is starting to talk now. I attended bereavement counselling which really helped.”

In loving remembrance of all babies who are lost to us. #BLAW2021 #WaveofLight

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